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Mulder's Laws
1. "Never put anything up your nose not from this planet"
2. "Never hibernate under an escalator"
3. "To Mulder, it's a ritually beheaded corpse with fifth-degree burns, to the rest of us it's a Thanksgiving turkey."
4. "Score: Loggers-0, MonkeyWrenchers-0, Bugs-34."
5. "Have an alibi handy. The police won't believe that your dead ex-boss is responsible when everyone you dislike keeps being murdered."
6. "If time is not a universal invariant in your zip code, then your mail delivery may be somewhat erratic."
7. "A man with a thing about unsecured lines is either paranoid or calls 1-900-BONDAGE numbers."
Spontaneous human combustion is the process of the body's temperature becoming heated to the point that the body simply bursts into flame and incinerates. No one knows the actual cause of why this happens. Some blame a chemical reaction within the body, others blame supernatural causes.
Seeing a murder on television... can help work off one's antagonisms. And if you haven't any antagonisms, the commercials will give you some.
~Alfred Hitchcock
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